Snarky Answers To Stupid Mets Mailbag Questions

Every week, Mets beat writer Marty Noble does a Mets Mailbag thing, where he answers question emailed by fans. Some questions are totally okay, but usually there are two or three ridiculous questions that he has to deliver nice answers to. I'll be dishing out the answers that they should be getting, the ones they'd get if Marty Noble had the balls to call them out.

Welcome to the first edition of "Snarky Answers to Stupid Mets Mailbag Questions":

Jose Reyes continues to make mistakes, but it seems manager Jerry Manuel does everything but call him out. He makes excuses for him. Yet Ryan Church, who plays as hard as anyone on this team, gets the wrath of his skipper for whatever reason Manuel had at the time. Should Manuel be treating Reyes differently? Has anyone in the clubhouse talked to Reyes and delivered the message that what's he doing is unacceptable and selfish? Or does this team miss that type of edge as well?
-- Robert N., Archbald, Pa.

Robert, first of all, let's just make this clear. If you are in any way implying that Ryan Church is better than Jose Reyes then you are fucking insane. Second of all, if Ryan Church is playing hard, then it isn't working. Church is doing worse than Reyes in basically every offensive category.

I hate when people like you assume that some players just don't try. I don't see why a guy who has the potential to make huge amounts of money and be very popular if he does try wouldn't try. All players try, some players just happen to suck, and even the best players get into slumps sometimes. It doesn't mean that they're not trying.

Also, what is Reyes doing that is unacceptable and selfish? Hitting .284 with a .363 OBP (both above league average)? Stealing 11 bases? Batting .273 with RISP (compared to the .268 MLB average with RISP)?

Yeah, I agree, Reyes and the team have no "edge". I mean, they're only in first place and 11-3 in their last 14 games, if they had edge they'd be 14-0 in their last 14 games.

Okay, next question:

For some reason, whenever Jose Valentin is around, Reyes' statistics increase dramatically. Shouldn't the Mets consider bringing Valentin up as a bench coach to keep him around the team?
-- Anthony V., Boston, Mass.

I'd only approve of Valentin returning to coach (they'd have to sign him to a coach's contract, because, as Marty Noble said, the Mets released him) if he engaged in regular mustache wars with Keith Hernandez.

Final question for today:


What has happened to Nick Evans? He had a tremendous spring and now he's been demoted to Double-A? Is Fernando Martinez going to make the club this year? Why isn't Reed getting more starts? He too had a great spring and seems capable of being a breakout player.
-- David B., Vero Beach, Fla.

OK, let's split this mega-question up a bit:

1. What has happened to Nick Evans? 7 for 75 with AAA Buffalo, a demotion, and a sports psychologist has happened to Nick Evans.

2.He had a tremendous spring and now he's been demoted to Double-A? I agree- all players with tremendous spring training performances should never be demoted regardless of their regular season performance.

3. Is Fernando Martinez going to make the club this year?
Hell yeah! Let's rush our top prospect, when we have about 500 OF with prior major league experience in our organization.

4. He too had a great spring and seems capable of being a breakout player. Not a question, but I feel I should address this:

Fernando Martinez had SIX AT BATS during spring training this year. SIX. He had two singles in those six at-bats. In what way is that a great spring?